Looking Back
Valerie Kuehne
Looking
back
it really was glamorous
tasteful, even.
Though
neither one really speaks of it-
or takes it out of context.
The way our
hair was dark
our nails were red
we took advantage
of each other
of congress
of adolescence.
The long
days
longer nights
weekends filled with cocaine safaris
vodka luncheons
waking up in
or in the arms
of Jesus Christ.
Work
shiny drama
the customers
formica
metal to lips
your David Bowie.
How that
one day
you screamed.
You couldn’t
take it
the people
the dimming Autumn
the pizza
life.
We watched
you
leave
unabashed
braids trailing behind you
how you’d forgotten the money
you’d made in tips.
I wonder
often
if you know
that you’re a legend,
a different species
icon for the broken
in the food service industry.
You must
realize
that I’m still here
that I wait for you
every shift,
but never tell anyone
that I’m really only speaking
to the air.
You won’t
look back
obviously
It wasn’t
glamour
only existence, survival.
That’s why
it’s never brought up in casual conversation.
No longer there.
No longer
potent
God knows I
no longer
braid my hair.